Tuesday, August 15, 2017

2017 08 10 (4) Thursday

23h : Earlier, around 2 PM, I set up my new little camp in a different place in  the woods. The stuff that 'Denver' gave me were really helpful to say the least (plastic sheet, rope and boxcutter). She definitely knows her stuff. At first, when I saw a rope in the little bag she gave me, I thought to myself : "A rope ?. You expect me to hang myself ?. Sorry baby. We Muslims don't hang ourselves, we use detonation !' (lol).

The rope and the boxcutter turned out to be very helpful to attach the plastic sheet to trees and have my dwelling underneath it. I laid a large plastic bag as my bed. The weather was gorgeous, topless and barefeet, I found a sunny spot and just sat there, taking in the sun and super relaxing, trying to purge the enormous load of negative energy accumulated these past 23 years in  BS NYC.

After my sunbath, I put my shirt back on and laid down pondering and relaxing even more. I remembered my cats and - shedding tears - I  asked Allah to spare them stress, anxiety and hardship. I hope the landlord contacted those cat-people from the list I gave him and they came to take good care of them.

While laying down, pondering and observing nature around me, without even forcing it, I was praising Allah (Alhamdulillah, Astaghfirullah...etc). Being in this environment, seemed to have kicked in my spiritual healing already. Not intending to harp on it. but life in NYC, is like being dipped in a pool of shit : May Allah curse those individuals (bureaucrats, politicians...etc) who make it a duty of theirs to pile up as much stress, anxiety and grief on people's shoulders. I can't help thinking that - more often than not - it seems as a symbiotic relationship between the oppressed and the oppressors, for they are as nasty, phony and dislikeable as one another !!.

Anyway, Alhamdulillah for plucking me out of there (I'll relate later - Insha'Allah - the few days before I JUST LEFT abruptly !) : being right now in the woods - surrounded by ants, beautiful spiders, other insects and chirping birds - is by far better to me than being in the Sheraton Hotel in Times Square, surrounded by the negative energy of zombies, unaware - or worse, in love - with their enslavement, and the negative energy their hungry ego radiates.

As I was saying to that christian young black man early this morning at the Donut shop (he came to pick up his white gf who is a night shift cashier at the center) : Allah created us primarily to  worship Him and He put us on this earth to manage it. The ruling class and their armies of narcissistic bureaucrats - ie : Satan's minions - hate Allah and His Creation, so they do everything they can to distract us from our primarily mission while spreading fear, pain and destruction all over the planet. Unfortunately, most people are consenting by doing their very best to look the other way ("he who remains silent is understood to consent"). We definitely weren't created to chase careers, the latest iphones, Nike shoes, paying mortgages, paying taxes, sitting in front of TV 6 hrs per day, laughing on command, crying on command,...etc. How can we worship Allah - as we ought to - when we are drowning in BS concerns, stress, anxiety, BS distractions, mind games to feed the ego...etc ?. It is simply impossible. Forgive me if I sound like I am pontificating and/or judgemental.

It is getting cold in here (Donut shop) because of the AC. I am going to see if they have 1 gallon bottled water at the nearby store, see if I can reach for some clothes in the drop off box nearby (I need a warm hat, long sleeve shirt and a decent looking pant (I have only 1 wearable short). I still have $27.

I am looking to some fasting for the next few days (except water). Money concerns aside and having a history of Bladder Cancer (a story for another day Insha'Allah), fasting simply kills the tumor because its glucose requirement is much higher than healthy cells. When I used to fast in NYC, after the 3rd day, I started peeing chunks of dead tumor. See the "Warburg Effect" (wikipedia : "Malignant, rapidly growing tumor cells typically have glycolytic rates up to 200 times higher than those of their normal tissues of origin; this occurs even if oxygen is plentiful."). I didn't see an oncologist since Sept. 2008 when he instilled BCG in my bladder and it infected my Prostate (Prostatitis) with the Intracellular Mycobacteria. When I told him, he nonchalantly replied "When it rains, you get wet". I doubt he would have said that, if I were white and wealthy. Whatever it is, Alhamdulillah, all is just part of the movie of my life, the pleasant as well as the unpleasant.

Signing off : 2017 08 11, 02h, Friday.

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